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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs I'm hungry = I'm hungry.I'm sleepy = I'm sleepy.I'm tired = I'm tired.Do you want to go to a movie? = I'd eventually like to have sex with you.Can I take you out to dinner? = I'd eventually like to have sex with you.Can I call you sometime? = I'd

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs What pillar doesn't need holding up ? A caterpillar !

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs Mrs.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs Why did the blonde have a sore belly button? Her boyfriend was also blonde.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs A man was helping one of his cows give birth, when he noticed his 11-year-old son standing wide-eyed at the fence, soaking in the whole event.The man thought, "Great...he's 11 and now I'm gonna have to start explaining the birds and bees.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs |The following are supposedly true headlines that have appeared in papers during the war.Some Leading Papers' Coverage of Custer's MassacreVariety: "Custer Closes Out of Town"Pravda: "Big Red Victory."Sports Illustrated: "Indians Win Series"Women'

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs Q: What did the hurricane say to the other hurricane? A: I have my eye on you.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs Things NOT to say to a Cop!1.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs At communion you go back for seconds.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs What kind of dog wears a uniform and medals ? A guard dog !

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs How can you tell which Burger Land baseball pitchers are left-handed? They're the one's wearing the left-handed 'meats'!

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs What lives in gum trees ? Stick insects !

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs A hillbilly family took a vacation to New York City.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs A farmer sent his 15 year old son to town and, as a birthday present, handed him a duck., "See if you can get a girl in exchange for this," he said.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs How do you hire an elephant ? Stand it on four bricks !

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs WIFE: "There's trouble with the car.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs What do you get if you cross a dog with a blind mole ? A dog that keeps barking up the wrong tree !

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs |On a rural road a state trooper pulled this farmer over and said: "Sir, do you realize your wife fell out of the car several miles back?"To which the farmer replied: "Thank God, I thought I had gone deaf!"

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs Waiter: Why didn't you make all the food on that long order? Cook: Because I'm a short order cook.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs An army Major visiting the sick soldiers, went to one private and asked, "What's your problem, Soldier?""Chronic syphilis, Sir.""What treatment are you getting?""Five minutes with the wire brush each day.""What's your ambition?""To get back to the

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