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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs A vacationing penguin is driving through Arizona when he noticesthat the oil-pressure light is on.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs A doctor came to the mental hospital to visit his patients.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs |The long awaited 1999 Darwin "Natural Selection" Awards have been released! These awards are given each year to bestow upon (the remains of) that individual, who through single-minded self-sacrifice, has done the most to remove undesirable elemen

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs |A new government 10 year survey cost ,000,000,000 revealed that 3/4 of the people in America make up 75% of the population.According to recent surveys, 51% of the people are in the majority.Did you know that 87.166253% of all statistics claim a

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs This bloke was ordered from the pool for pissing in the water."That's ridiculous!" he shouted at the pool manager.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs "Why did your boyfriend return his Christmas tie?" "He said it was too tight."

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs Three cowboys, a Texan, a Californian, and an Oregonian, were sitting around a campfire smoking, drinking and having a good time.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the ribs and cackling, telling me, "You're next." They stopped after I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs |Little Willie asked his mother: "Mamma, don't soldiers ever go to heaven?""Of course they do!" protested his mother.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs One day the different parts of the body were having an argument to see which should be in charge.The brain said "I do all the thinking so I'm the most important and I should be in charge."The eyes said "I see everything and let the rest of you kno

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs There was a scottsman and he was too drunk to walk home from the bar.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs Once heard from a girl who just broke up with someone:My old boyfriend and I weren't compatible.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs What do you call the everyday routines of rabbits? Rabbits habits.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs Mr.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs This guy arrives at the Pearly Gates.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs Q: Why didn't the monster make the football team?A: Because he threw like a ghoul!

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs What do you call an Internet mystery? An e-nigma.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs A little guy gets on a plane and sits next to the window. A few minutes later, a big, heavy, strong mean-looking, hulking guy plops down in the seat next to him and immediately falls asleep.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs Knock Knock Who's there ! Charles ! Charles who ? Charles your luck on the lottery !

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs You know you're Castle Trash if......Your shroud of Turin is painted on velvetYour daughter's chastity belt has rustedYou can't afford a cod piece................nobody noticesYou have more sheep dogs than sheepYou sold your only horse to buy that

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