Tag: Laughs

: #Laughs I walked into a bar the other day and ordered a double. The bartender brought out a guy who looked just like me.

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: #Laughs Why did you drive the lawn mower over your Easter basket? I thought the plastic grass was growing too high!

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: #Laughs There once was a rich man who was near death.

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: #Laughs Harry says to his pet parrot Smitty, "What do you want for your birthday?" Smitty says, "I want to get laid."So Harry takes Smitty to a parrot whore house, gives him a hundred bucks, and Smitty goes upstairs with a hot-looking parrot whore.After a

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: #Laughs Why does mama aardvark call her husband a cannibal? Because he ate his ant for dinner!

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: #Laughs What did the bee say to the flower ? Hello honey !

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: #Laughs Teacher: "What did the Indians bring to the first Thanksgiving?" Student: "Baseballs." Teacher: "Baseballs?" Student: "Yeah, they were Cleveland Indians!"

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: #Laughs What is an autobiography? The life story of an automobile.

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: #Laughs An archaeologist was digging in the Negev Desert in Israel and came upon a casket containing a mummy.

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: #Laughs Why did the condom cross the road? Because it was pissed off.

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: #Laughs Yo mama so fat when she has wants someone to shake her hand, she has to give directions!

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: #Laughs How do you communicate with the Loch Ness Monster at 20,000 fathoms? Drop him a line.

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: #Laughs How many lawyers does it take to stop a moving bus? Never enough.

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: #Laughs A Russian, a Cuban, an American and a Lawyer are in a train.

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: #Laughs Once a man went to a resturant and ordered an egg.

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: #Laughs A police dog responds to an ad for work with the FBI.

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: #Laughs A husband and wife decided they needed to use "code" to indicate that they wanted to have sex without letting their children in on it.They decided on the word Typewriter.One day the husband told his five year old daughter, "Go tell your mommy that

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: #Laughs RELATIONSHIPS:First of all, a man does not call a relationship a relationship -- he refers to it as "that time when me and Suzie were doing it on a semi-regular basis".When a relationship ends, a woman will cry and pour her heart out to her girlfr

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: #Laughs After the Great Britain Beer Festival, in London, all the brewery presidents decided to go out for a beer.

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: #Laughs What does Kurt Cobain and Michaelangelo have in common? They both used their brains to paint the ceiling.

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: #Laughs I walked into a bar the other day and ordered a double. The bartender brought out a guy who looked just like me.

: #Laughs Why did you drive the lawn mower over your Easter basket? I thought the plastic grass was growing too high!

: #Laughs There once was a rich man who was near death.

: #Laughs Harry says to his pet parrot Smitty, "What do you want for your birthday?" Smitty says, "I want to get laid."So Harry takes Smitty to a parrot whore house, gives him a hundred bucks, and Smitty goes upstairs with a hot-looking parrot whore.After a

: #Laughs Why does mama aardvark call her husband a cannibal? Because he ate his ant for dinner!

: #Laughs What did the bee say to the flower ? Hello honey !

: #Laughs Teacher: "What did the Indians bring to the first Thanksgiving?" Student: "Baseballs." Teacher: "Baseballs?" Student: "Yeah, they were Cleveland Indians!"

: #Laughs What is an autobiography? The life story of an automobile.

: #Laughs An archaeologist was digging in the Negev Desert in Israel and came upon a casket containing a mummy.

: #Laughs Why did the condom cross the road? Because it was pissed off.

: #Laughs Yo mama so fat when she has wants someone to shake her hand, she has to give directions!

: #Laughs How do you communicate with the Loch Ness Monster at 20,000 fathoms? Drop him a line.

: #Laughs How many lawyers does it take to stop a moving bus? Never enough.

: #Laughs A Russian, a Cuban, an American and a Lawyer are in a train.

: #Laughs Once a man went to a resturant and ordered an egg.

: #Laughs A police dog responds to an ad for work with the FBI.

: #Laughs A husband and wife decided they needed to use "code" to indicate that they wanted to have sex without letting their children in on it.They decided on the word Typewriter.One day the husband told his five year old daughter, "Go tell your mommy that

: #Laughs RELATIONSHIPS:First of all, a man does not call a relationship a relationship -- he refers to it as "that time when me and Suzie were doing it on a semi-regular basis".When a relationship ends, a woman will cry and pour her heart out to her girlfr

: #Laughs After the Great Britain Beer Festival, in London, all the brewery presidents decided to go out for a beer.

: #Laughs What does Kurt Cobain and Michaelangelo have in common? They both used their brains to paint the ceiling.

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