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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs Q: How can you tell when Bill Clinton is telling a lie by looking at his face? A: If his lips are moving, then he's lying.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs Tyler was excited about his first day at school.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs Carpet Fitting by Walter Wall

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs A local United Way office realized that it had never received a donation from the town's most successful lawyer.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs A man was complaining to a friend. "I had it all.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs What's a ghosts favorite ride at the carnival? The roller ghosted.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs ~WHAT DO YOU CALL A SPICE GIRL WITH TWO BRAIN CELLS? PREGNANT~WHAT DO YOU CALL A SPICE GIRL BEHIND A STEERING WHEEL? AN AIRBAG~WHAT DO YOU SEE WHEN YOU LOOK INTO A SPICE GIRLS EYES? THE BACK OF HER HEAD

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs When the crooked hamburger took it on the 'lamb', where did it go? Oh, 'ewe' know!

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs John and David were both patients in a Mental hospital.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs What lies on the ground 100 feet up in the air and smells? A dead centipede.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs Why did God give deers eyes? I have no eye-deer!

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs A recent survey done by marriage experts shows that the most common form of marriage proposal these days consists of the words: "You're what?!?"

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs A pastor in Maine skipped services one Sunday to go bear hunting.Along the trail he turned a corner and collided with a bear.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs In a restroom at IBM's Watson Center, a supervisor had placed a sign directly above the sink.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs I heard that if you play the Windows NT 4.0 CD backwards, you'll get a satanic message.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs Why did the vampire enjoy ballroom dancing? He could really get into the vaultz.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs I wouldn't say that Christmas gnomes are cross-eyed, but when they cry the tears run down their back!

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs President Clinton to maid: Mam, can you do something about Hillary's room.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs |Q: How do you know that owls are cleverer than chickens?A: Have you ever heard of Kentucky-fried owl!Q: Which birds steal soap from the bath?A: Robber ducks!Q: What kind of bird opens doors?A: A kiwi!Q: What language do birds speak?A: Pigeon Engl

Posted in: #Laughs

FunnyJohny

: #Laughs Dear God: Yesterday was an awful day for me... My husband ran off with his secretary, My son pierced his eyebrow, My daughter tattooed the bald spot on her head, My dog mated with the neighbors cat, My neighbor sold her hous

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