Tag: Laughs

: #Laughs |An accordion is a bagpipe with pleats.Q: What is the definition of an optimist?A: An accordion player with a pager.Q: What is the difference between an Uzi and an accordion?A: The Uzi stops after 20 rounds.Q: What do accordion players use as a co

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: #Laughs Psychiatrist to his nurse: "Just say we're very busy.

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: #Laughs Husband: Honey, if I died, would you get remarried? Wife: Well, I suppose so.Husband: Would you and he sleep in the same bed? Wife: I guess we would.Husband: Would you make love to him? Wife: He would be my husband then, dear.Husband: Would you gi

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: #Laughs Mother calls up stairs, "You boys better get down here and eat your breakfast or you'll be late for school!"As they are ambling down, the 5-year-old turns to the 4-year-old, stops and says, "Today we're gonna learn to swear!" The 4-year-old gives

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: #Laughs What did the ruthless businessman say to his employees? If at first you don't succeed - you're fired!

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: #Laughs Grandpa is running around in the nursing home with his privates hanging out of his pants screaming : "My penis just died, my penis just died!"The nurses calm him down,and he goes back to his room.

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: #Laughs An Italian, an American, and a Polak were captured by the French for various crimes and are taken to the Guillotine.The executioner places the Italian on the block and asks if he has any last words.

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: #Laughs A police car pulls up in front of grandma Bessie's house, and grandpa Morris gets out. The polite policeman explained that this elderly gentleman said that he was lost in the park...and couldn't find his way home.

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: #Laughs Do you think, Professor, that my wife should take up the piano as a career? No, I think she should put down the lid as a favor.

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: #Laughs A man walks into a bar and orders a shot then looks into his pocket.

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: #Laughs Why should you always refuse to lend an Ape money? It's dangerous to let him put the bite on you!

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: #Laughs One behaviorist to another after lovemaking: "Darling, that was wonderful for you.

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: #Laughs |From: Efficiency & Ticket, Ltd., Management ConsultantsTo: Chairman, The London Symphony OrchestraRe: Schubert's Symphony No.

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: #Laughs Q: How many Chinese Red Guards does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: 10,000 - to give the bulb a cultural revolution.

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: #Laughs Why did the monster go into hospital? To have his ghoul-stones removed.

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: #Laughs What do you call a pair of skunks that are 69'ing?OdorEaters!!!

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: #Laughs Teacher: Name two pronouns ? Pupil: Who ?, me ?

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: #Laughs This is a story about four people named Everybody, Somebody, Anybody, and Nobody.There was an important job to be done, and Everybody was asked to do it.

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: #Laughs |"This is Captain Sinclair speaking.

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: #Laughs There were three priests in a railroad station, all wanting to go hometo Pittsburg.

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: #Laughs |An accordion is a bagpipe with pleats.Q: What is the definition of an optimist?A: An accordion player with a pager.Q: What is the difference between an Uzi and an accordion?A: The Uzi stops after 20 rounds.Q: What do accordion players use as a co

: #Laughs Psychiatrist to his nurse: "Just say we're very busy.

: #Laughs Husband: Honey, if I died, would you get remarried? Wife: Well, I suppose so.Husband: Would you and he sleep in the same bed? Wife: I guess we would.Husband: Would you make love to him? Wife: He would be my husband then, dear.Husband: Would you gi

: #Laughs Mother calls up stairs, "You boys better get down here and eat your breakfast or you'll be late for school!"As they are ambling down, the 5-year-old turns to the 4-year-old, stops and says, "Today we're gonna learn to swear!" The 4-year-old gives

: #Laughs What did the ruthless businessman say to his employees? If at first you don't succeed - you're fired!

: #Laughs Grandpa is running around in the nursing home with his privates hanging out of his pants screaming : "My penis just died, my penis just died!"The nurses calm him down,and he goes back to his room.

: #Laughs An Italian, an American, and a Polak were captured by the French for various crimes and are taken to the Guillotine.The executioner places the Italian on the block and asks if he has any last words.

: #Laughs A police car pulls up in front of grandma Bessie's house, and grandpa Morris gets out. The polite policeman explained that this elderly gentleman said that he was lost in the park...and couldn't find his way home.

: #Laughs Do you think, Professor, that my wife should take up the piano as a career? No, I think she should put down the lid as a favor.

: #Laughs A man walks into a bar and orders a shot then looks into his pocket.

: #Laughs Why should you always refuse to lend an Ape money? It's dangerous to let him put the bite on you!

: #Laughs One behaviorist to another after lovemaking: "Darling, that was wonderful for you.

: #Laughs |From: Efficiency & Ticket, Ltd., Management ConsultantsTo: Chairman, The London Symphony OrchestraRe: Schubert's Symphony No.

: #Laughs Q: How many Chinese Red Guards does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: 10,000 - to give the bulb a cultural revolution.

: #Laughs Why did the monster go into hospital? To have his ghoul-stones removed.

: #Laughs What do you call a pair of skunks that are 69'ing?OdorEaters!!!

: #Laughs Teacher: Name two pronouns ? Pupil: Who ?, me ?

: #Laughs This is a story about four people named Everybody, Somebody, Anybody, and Nobody.There was an important job to be done, and Everybody was asked to do it.

: #Laughs |"This is Captain Sinclair speaking.

: #Laughs There were three priests in a railroad station, all wanting to go hometo Pittsburg.

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