Tag: Laughs

: #Laughs A man walks into an auto parts store and says "I'd like a rear view mirror for my Yugo." The man behind the counter thinks about this for a while, then says "Yup, seems like a fair trade to me."

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: #Laughs Jay: Does the Bible say that if you smoke you can't get to heaven? Ted: No, but the more you smoke the quicker you'll get there.

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: #Laughs The Top 5 Men in a Woman's life are:1.

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: #Laughs Q: What do Israeli soldiers do when they get bored?A: They go over to the West Bank & the Gaza Strip and get stoned.

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: #Laughs Before a burglary trial, the judge explained to the defendant, "You can let me try your case, or you can choose to have a jury of your peers." The man thought for a moment.

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: #Laughs I've sure gotten old.

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: #Laughs For those of you about to become first-time fathers, you should know something that us old pros do: there are three stages of sex with your mate during pregnancy.During the first trimester, you do it regular style.

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: #Laughs |An American will say, "Hot day!" A Canadian will say, "Hot day, eh?" meaning "It's a hot day, isn't it?"This is something deeper than spelling or pronunciation.

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: #Laughs Nowhere, VermontSam had been in the hectic newspaper business for twenty-five years when he decided that he was sick of the stress and quit his job.

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: #Laughs What is taller when it sits down than when it stands up? A dog.

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: #Laughs What profession did the parrot get into when it swallowed the clock? Politics

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: #Laughs What do elves learn in school?The ELF-abet.How many reindeer does Santa have?11 (named below):Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, Comet, Cupid, Donner, Blitzen,Rudolph (the one with the red nose),Olive (all of the other reigndeer)and Al (Then Al the r

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: #Laughs Investigating a purse snatching, Brunswick, Georgia, detectives picked up a man who fit the thief's description and drove him back to the scene.

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: #Laughs Two priests and a rabbi were discussing what portion of the weekly collection they kept for themselves.The first priest explained that he drew a circle on the ground, stepped a few paces back and pitched the money towards the circle.

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: #Laughs When this guy heard that the Pope was coming to town, he went out and bought a tuxedo in the hope that the Pope might notice him on the parade route.

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: #Laughs Q: What do you call a fly buzzing inside a blonde's head?A: A Space Invader.

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: #Laughs Mother: How do you like your new teacher ? Son: I don't.

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: #Laughs How do you piss your girlfriend of when your having sex?Call her up

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: #Laughs On some air bases the Air Force is on one side of the field and civilian aircraft use the other side of the field, with the control tower in the middle. One day the tower received a call from an aircraft asking, "What time is it?"

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: #Laughs TWO MEN SITTING BESIDE ONE ANOTHER IN A BAR.THE 1ST MAN IS AN AVERAGE SIZE GUY WEIGHINGABOUT 170 LBS.THE 2ND MAN IS A HUGE FAT GUY WEIGHING ABOUT375 LBS.THE 2ND GUY ASKS THE 1ST GUY.

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: #Laughs A man walks into an auto parts store and says "I'd like a rear view mirror for my Yugo." The man behind the counter thinks about this for a while, then says "Yup, seems like a fair trade to me."

: #Laughs Jay: Does the Bible say that if you smoke you can't get to heaven? Ted: No, but the more you smoke the quicker you'll get there.

: #Laughs The Top 5 Men in a Woman's life are:1.

: #Laughs Q: What do Israeli soldiers do when they get bored?A: They go over to the West Bank & the Gaza Strip and get stoned.

: #Laughs Before a burglary trial, the judge explained to the defendant, "You can let me try your case, or you can choose to have a jury of your peers." The man thought for a moment.

: #Laughs I've sure gotten old.

: #Laughs For those of you about to become first-time fathers, you should know something that us old pros do: there are three stages of sex with your mate during pregnancy.During the first trimester, you do it regular style.

: #Laughs |An American will say, "Hot day!" A Canadian will say, "Hot day, eh?" meaning "It's a hot day, isn't it?"This is something deeper than spelling or pronunciation.

: #Laughs Nowhere, VermontSam had been in the hectic newspaper business for twenty-five years when he decided that he was sick of the stress and quit his job.

: #Laughs What is taller when it sits down than when it stands up? A dog.

: #Laughs What profession did the parrot get into when it swallowed the clock? Politics

: #Laughs What do elves learn in school?The ELF-abet.How many reindeer does Santa have?11 (named below):Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, Comet, Cupid, Donner, Blitzen,Rudolph (the one with the red nose),Olive (all of the other reigndeer)and Al (Then Al the r

: #Laughs Investigating a purse snatching, Brunswick, Georgia, detectives picked up a man who fit the thief's description and drove him back to the scene.

: #Laughs Two priests and a rabbi were discussing what portion of the weekly collection they kept for themselves.The first priest explained that he drew a circle on the ground, stepped a few paces back and pitched the money towards the circle.

: #Laughs When this guy heard that the Pope was coming to town, he went out and bought a tuxedo in the hope that the Pope might notice him on the parade route.

: #Laughs Q: What do you call a fly buzzing inside a blonde's head?A: A Space Invader.

: #Laughs Mother: How do you like your new teacher ? Son: I don't.

: #Laughs How do you piss your girlfriend of when your having sex?Call her up

: #Laughs On some air bases the Air Force is on one side of the field and civilian aircraft use the other side of the field, with the control tower in the middle. One day the tower received a call from an aircraft asking, "What time is it?"

: #Laughs TWO MEN SITTING BESIDE ONE ANOTHER IN A BAR.THE 1ST MAN IS AN AVERAGE SIZE GUY WEIGHINGABOUT 170 LBS.THE 2ND MAN IS A HUGE FAT GUY WEIGHING ABOUT375 LBS.THE 2ND GUY ASKS THE 1ST GUY.

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