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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs On the way to preschool, the doctor had left her stethoscope on the car seat, and her little girl picked it up and began playing with it. 'Be still, my heart,' thought my friend, 'my daughter wants to follow in my footsteps!' Then the

Posted in: #Laughs

FunnyJohny

: #Laughs A fire chief died and went to heaven.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs A Texan farmer goes to Australia for a vacation.There he meets an Aussie farmer and gets talking.The Aussie shows off his big wheat field and the Texan says,"Oh! We have wheat fields that are at least twice as large."Then they walk around the ranc

Posted in: #Laughs

FunnyJohny

: #Laughs |What did the worm say to the other when he was late home?Where in earth have you been!

Posted in: #Laughs

FunnyJohny

: #Laughs Three bulls heard via the grapevine that the rancher was going to bring yet another bull onto the ranch, and the prospect raised a discussion among them.First Bull: "Boys, we all know I've been here 5 years.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs At a lesson in topography a soldier was asked: "What is farther away, Harrison, the moon or that object on this map?" "That object, naturally." "What makes you think that?" " 'Cause we can see the moon any clear night, and we can't se

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs Mrs Saggy: Mrs Wrinkly tried to have a facelift last week.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs Jesus walks upon a crowd with an adulteress crouching in a corner with a mob around her preparing to stone her to death.Jesus stops them and says, "Let he who is without sin cast the first stone!"Suddenly a woman at the back of the crowd fires off

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs What kind of drugs are mail carriers not tested for?SPEED!

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs A man enters a barber shop for a shave.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs |Why was the centipede late?Because he was playing "This little Piggy" with his baby brother!What do you get if you cross a centipede and a parrot?A walkie talkie!What is worse than a giraffe with a sore throat?A centipede with chilblains!What has

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs Q: Why do penguins live in the Arctic?A: Because they can't fly to Florida like the rest of the old birds.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs Democrats do much of their shopping at Target and Wal-Mart.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs After years of marriage, Ole and Lena found themselves in bed one night.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs |In the dim and distant pastWhen life's tempo wasn't so fast,Grandma used to rock and knit,Crochet, tat and baby sit.When the kids were in a jam,They could always call on Gram.But today she's in the gymExercising to keep slim.She's checking the we

Posted in: #Laughs

FunnyJohny

: #Laughs An applicant was filling out a job application.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs |Did you hear about the blonde who took an hour to cook Minute Rice?Did you hear about the blonde who got into the taxi, and the driver kept the "Vacant" sign up?Did you hear about the blonde who was an M.D.--Mentally Deficient?Did you hear about

Posted in: #Laughs

FunnyJohny

: #Laughs Q: What's the difference between white onions, brown onions and a 14 inch dick?A: Nothing.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs Back in the Old West three Texas cowboys were about to be hung for cattle rustling.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs Q: Why did the blonde fail her drivers licence ? A: She wasn't used to the front seat!

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