Tag: Laughs

: #Laughs |At the time of writing, Microsoft's slogan for Windows 95 was "Where do you want to go today?" These are some alternative and probably more truthful ad slogans for use with Windows.1.

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: #Laughs 100 facecloths 25 darning needles any kind of keychain with something _way_ too big to fit in pocket or purse bag of potting mix box of legal size hanging file folders bucket of sand cat door cellophane tape and staples dairy for 1991 exquisitely

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: #Laughs A guy came home to his wife and said to her: "Guess what? I've found a great job.

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: #Laughs Why did the runner quit the race against bigfoot?He couldn't face defeet!!

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: #Laughs The new employee stood before the paper shredder looking confused.

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: #Laughs Q.) What does it mean when the flag is at half mast at the post office? A.) They're hiring.Q.) What did the fish say when he hit a concrete wall? A.) "Dam."Q.) How do crazy people go through the forest? A.) They take the psycho path.Q.) What do Es

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: #Laughs Q: What did the Production Manager give his kids for Christmas? A: Nothing.

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: #Laughs Warning to shoplifters: Anyone caught shoplifting will be beaten, gagged, whipped and tortured.

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: #Laughs |OLD HIKERS never die, they just trail awayOLD HIPPIES never die, they just smell that wayOLD HOCKEY PLAYERS never die, they just achieve their final goalOLD HOMEBREWERS never die, they just ferment awayOLD HUNTERS never die, they just stay LOADED

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: #Laughs A 87 year-old man went to the doctor to get a physical.A few days later, the doctor saw the man walking down the street with a gorgeous young lady on his arm.A couple of days later, when the old man had an appointment with the doctor again, the do

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: #Laughs Teacher: Why are you late?Little Johnny: Because of the sign.Teacher: What sign?Little Johnny: The one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow.

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: #Laughs How many brewers does it take to change a light bulb? Third as many as for a regular bulb.

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: #Laughs What did the Eskimo children sing when their principal was leaving? Freeze a Jolly Good Fellow.

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: #Laughs Q: Why did god give blonde's 2 more brain cells than he gave cows? A: So they wouldn't shit all over when you played with their tits.

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: #Laughs How do scaredy-cats answer the phone? Yellow?

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: #Laughs One day, a girl walked up to her mother and looked at her mother'shair and sadly said: "Why is some of your hair white mommy?"The mother replied, "Well, every time that you do something wrong and make me cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turn white.

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: #Laughs Q: How many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb?A: Two...but I don't know how they'd get in there!

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: #Laughs What kind of bread do pig ladles make in the Yukon? Sow-r dough bread.

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: #Laughs Joan, a rather well-proportioned & near-sighted secretary, spent almost all of her vacation sunbathing on the roof of her hotel.

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: #Laughs Sam was on his death bed, and his wife and children were gatheredaround him.

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: #Laughs |At the time of writing, Microsoft's slogan for Windows 95 was "Where do you want to go today?" These are some alternative and probably more truthful ad slogans for use with Windows.1.

: #Laughs 100 facecloths 25 darning needles any kind of keychain with something _way_ too big to fit in pocket or purse bag of potting mix box of legal size hanging file folders bucket of sand cat door cellophane tape and staples dairy for 1991 exquisitely

: #Laughs A guy came home to his wife and said to her: "Guess what? I've found a great job.

: #Laughs Why did the runner quit the race against bigfoot?He couldn't face defeet!!

: #Laughs The new employee stood before the paper shredder looking confused.

: #Laughs Q.) What does it mean when the flag is at half mast at the post office? A.) They're hiring.Q.) What did the fish say when he hit a concrete wall? A.) "Dam."Q.) How do crazy people go through the forest? A.) They take the psycho path.Q.) What do Es

: #Laughs Q: What did the Production Manager give his kids for Christmas? A: Nothing.

: #Laughs Warning to shoplifters: Anyone caught shoplifting will be beaten, gagged, whipped and tortured.

: #Laughs |OLD HIKERS never die, they just trail awayOLD HIPPIES never die, they just smell that wayOLD HOCKEY PLAYERS never die, they just achieve their final goalOLD HOMEBREWERS never die, they just ferment awayOLD HUNTERS never die, they just stay LOADED

: #Laughs A 87 year-old man went to the doctor to get a physical.A few days later, the doctor saw the man walking down the street with a gorgeous young lady on his arm.A couple of days later, when the old man had an appointment with the doctor again, the do

: #Laughs Teacher: Why are you late?Little Johnny: Because of the sign.Teacher: What sign?Little Johnny: The one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow.

: #Laughs How many brewers does it take to change a light bulb? Third as many as for a regular bulb.

: #Laughs What did the Eskimo children sing when their principal was leaving? Freeze a Jolly Good Fellow.

: #Laughs Q: Why did god give blonde's 2 more brain cells than he gave cows? A: So they wouldn't shit all over when you played with their tits.

: #Laughs How do scaredy-cats answer the phone? Yellow?

: #Laughs One day, a girl walked up to her mother and looked at her mother'shair and sadly said: "Why is some of your hair white mommy?"The mother replied, "Well, every time that you do something wrong and make me cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turn white.

: #Laughs Q: How many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb?A: Two...but I don't know how they'd get in there!

: #Laughs What kind of bread do pig ladles make in the Yukon? Sow-r dough bread.

: #Laughs Joan, a rather well-proportioned & near-sighted secretary, spent almost all of her vacation sunbathing on the roof of her hotel.

: #Laughs Sam was on his death bed, and his wife and children were gatheredaround him.

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