Tag: Laughs

: #Laughs The recent announcement that Donner and Blitzen have elected to take the early reindeer retirement package has triggered a good deal of concern about whether they will be replaced, and about other restructuring decisions at the North Pole.Streamli

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: #Laughs Who drives away all his customers ? A taxi driver.

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: #Laughs |TO: ALL PERSONNELFROM: ACCOUNTING It has come to our attention recently that many of you have been turning in timesheets that specify large amounts of "Miscellaneous Unproductive Time" (Code 5309).

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: #Laughs This elderly woman passed a police van loading up the girls from a local brothel, and as she passed by, she asked one girl what the lineup was for.

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: #Laughs |A policeman pulls a man over for speeding and asks him to get out of the car.

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: #Laughs These are actual newspaper headlines gathered from papers across the country.

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: #Laughs What 8-letter word has one letter in it? Envelope.

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: #Laughs My mother-in-law is like a fine French Impressionist painting. She's very lovely, but is best appreciated at a distance.

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: #Laughs Q: What would Princess Diana be doing right now if she were alive today?A: Scratching on the lid of her casket.

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: #Laughs This bloke was ordered from the pool for pissing in the water."That's ridiculous!" he shouted at the pool manager.

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: #Laughs What's the difference between an oral thermometer and a rectal thermometer?The taste.

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: #Laughs What do you call a person who falls onto you on a train ? A laplander !

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: #Laughs |Q: What do you get if you cross a woodpecker with a carrier pigeon?A: A bird who knocks before delivering its message!Q: What do you call a very rude bird?A: A mockingbird!Q: Where do birds meet for coffee?A: In a nest-cafe!Q: How does a bird wit

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: #Laughs |The following is supposedly a true story.

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: #Laughs A fireman looked out of the fire house window and noticed a little boy playing on the sidewalk.

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: #Laughs At the card shop: A woman was spending a long time looking at the cards, finally shaking her head, "No." A clerk came over and asked, "May I help you?" "I don't know," said the woman.

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: #Laughs The scene is a dark jungle.

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: #Laughs How is snow white? -Pretty good, according to the 7 dwarfs

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: #Laughs What artistic dog chews a lot and follows the rules of the farm where it lives? A Chihuahua that can draw and gnaw while obeying the law and lying on straw!

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: #Laughs Teacher: This is the third time I've had to tell you off this week, what have you got to say about that? Pupil: Thank heavens it's Friday!

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: #Laughs The recent announcement that Donner and Blitzen have elected to take the early reindeer retirement package has triggered a good deal of concern about whether they will be replaced, and about other restructuring decisions at the North Pole.Streamli

: #Laughs Who drives away all his customers ? A taxi driver.

: #Laughs |TO: ALL PERSONNELFROM: ACCOUNTING It has come to our attention recently that many of you have been turning in timesheets that specify large amounts of "Miscellaneous Unproductive Time" (Code 5309).

: #Laughs This elderly woman passed a police van loading up the girls from a local brothel, and as she passed by, she asked one girl what the lineup was for.

: #Laughs |A policeman pulls a man over for speeding and asks him to get out of the car.

: #Laughs These are actual newspaper headlines gathered from papers across the country.

: #Laughs What 8-letter word has one letter in it? Envelope.

: #Laughs My mother-in-law is like a fine French Impressionist painting. She's very lovely, but is best appreciated at a distance.

: #Laughs Q: What would Princess Diana be doing right now if she were alive today?A: Scratching on the lid of her casket.

: #Laughs This bloke was ordered from the pool for pissing in the water."That's ridiculous!" he shouted at the pool manager.

: #Laughs What's the difference between an oral thermometer and a rectal thermometer?The taste.

: #Laughs What do you call a person who falls onto you on a train ? A laplander !

: #Laughs |Q: What do you get if you cross a woodpecker with a carrier pigeon?A: A bird who knocks before delivering its message!Q: What do you call a very rude bird?A: A mockingbird!Q: Where do birds meet for coffee?A: In a nest-cafe!Q: How does a bird wit

: #Laughs |The following is supposedly a true story.

: #Laughs A fireman looked out of the fire house window and noticed a little boy playing on the sidewalk.

: #Laughs At the card shop: A woman was spending a long time looking at the cards, finally shaking her head, "No." A clerk came over and asked, "May I help you?" "I don't know," said the woman.

: #Laughs The scene is a dark jungle.

: #Laughs How is snow white? -Pretty good, according to the 7 dwarfs

: #Laughs What artistic dog chews a lot and follows the rules of the farm where it lives? A Chihuahua that can draw and gnaw while obeying the law and lying on straw!

: #Laughs Teacher: This is the third time I've had to tell you off this week, what have you got to say about that? Pupil: Thank heavens it's Friday!

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