Tag: Laughs

: #Laughs A husband and wife are getting ready to go to bed.The husband says, "I thought we'd have sex tonight."The wife replies, "No, I'm too tired tonight."The husband says, "Is that your final answer?"The wife says, "Yes, it is, thank you."The husband sa

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: #Laughs How many accountants does it take to change a light bulb? "What kind of answer did you have in mind?" Two, one to change the light bulb and one to check that it was done within the given budget.

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: #Laughs When you are young, you want to be the master of your fate and the captain of your soul.

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: #Laughs There was once an aspiring veterinarian who put himself through veterinary school working nights as a taxidermist.Upon graduation, he decided he could combine his two vocations to better serve the needs of his patients and their owners, while doub

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: #Laughs Doctor, Doctor my baby is the image of his father Never mind just so long as he's healthy!

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: #Laughs What's brown and crispy on the outside, and white and creamy on the inside? A cockroach.

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: #Laughs Knock Knock Who's there ! Bridie ! Bridie who ? Bridie light of the silvery moon !

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: #Laughs The old man had died.

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: #Laughs Farmer John had just walked into the local watering hole, when who should he see, but his old friend Chris the tractor salesman sitting up at the bar.

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: #Laughs The barber was finishing a haircut on a customer one dayand started to apply some 'Aftershave Lotion' around hisears when the customer yelled, "Don't put that crap on me!My wife says it smells like a French Whorehouse!"Another customer who was wai

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: #Laughs Teacher: Frd, give me a sentence starting with "I." Fred: I is .

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: #Laughs What is the only breed of dog a boxer is afraid of? A Doberman puncher!

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: #Laughs In prison you spend the majority of your time in an 8' X 10' cell.At work you spend most of your time in a 6' X 8' cubicle.In prison you get three meals a day.At work you only get a break for one meal and you have to pay for that one.In prison you

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: #Laughs How can you tell if your college roomate is gay?-His dick tastes like shit.

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: #Laughs What's with the people who put carpeting on the lid of their toilet seat? What are they thinking -- "Gosh, if we have a party there may not be enough standing room; I'd better carpet the toilet too."What's with this weird hotel custom of leaving a

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: #Laughs A couple from earth has finally saved up enough money to take a vacation on mars (they could do that then).

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: #Laughs The US Standard railroad gauge (distance between the rails) is 4 feet, 8.5 inches.

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: #Laughs Software Development Process1) Order the T-shirts for the Development team2) Announce availability3) Write the code4) Write the manual5) Hire a Product Manager6) Spec the software (writing the specs after the code helps to ensure that the

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: #Laughs The newlyweds showed up at the hotel and asked for the honeymoon suite."Do you have reservations?" asked the desk clerk."Only one, " replied the groom, "she won't take it up the ass."

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: #Laughs A husband and wife are in bed watching "Who Wants to be a Millionaire". The husband asks for sex. The wife says, "No." > Her husband asks, "Is that your final answer?" > She responds, "Yes." He says, "Then, I'd like to cal

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: #Laughs A husband and wife are getting ready to go to bed.The husband says, "I thought we'd have sex tonight."The wife replies, "No, I'm too tired tonight."The husband says, "Is that your final answer?"The wife says, "Yes, it is, thank you."The husband sa

: #Laughs How many accountants does it take to change a light bulb? "What kind of answer did you have in mind?" Two, one to change the light bulb and one to check that it was done within the given budget.

: #Laughs When you are young, you want to be the master of your fate and the captain of your soul.

: #Laughs There was once an aspiring veterinarian who put himself through veterinary school working nights as a taxidermist.Upon graduation, he decided he could combine his two vocations to better serve the needs of his patients and their owners, while doub

: #Laughs Doctor, Doctor my baby is the image of his father Never mind just so long as he's healthy!

: #Laughs What's brown and crispy on the outside, and white and creamy on the inside? A cockroach.

: #Laughs Knock Knock Who's there ! Bridie ! Bridie who ? Bridie light of the silvery moon !

: #Laughs The old man had died.

: #Laughs Farmer John had just walked into the local watering hole, when who should he see, but his old friend Chris the tractor salesman sitting up at the bar.

: #Laughs The barber was finishing a haircut on a customer one dayand started to apply some 'Aftershave Lotion' around hisears when the customer yelled, "Don't put that crap on me!My wife says it smells like a French Whorehouse!"Another customer who was wai

: #Laughs Teacher: Frd, give me a sentence starting with "I." Fred: I is .

: #Laughs What is the only breed of dog a boxer is afraid of? A Doberman puncher!

: #Laughs In prison you spend the majority of your time in an 8' X 10' cell.At work you spend most of your time in a 6' X 8' cubicle.In prison you get three meals a day.At work you only get a break for one meal and you have to pay for that one.In prison you

: #Laughs How can you tell if your college roomate is gay?-His dick tastes like shit.

: #Laughs What's with the people who put carpeting on the lid of their toilet seat? What are they thinking -- "Gosh, if we have a party there may not be enough standing room; I'd better carpet the toilet too."What's with this weird hotel custom of leaving a

: #Laughs A couple from earth has finally saved up enough money to take a vacation on mars (they could do that then).

: #Laughs The US Standard railroad gauge (distance between the rails) is 4 feet, 8.5 inches.

: #Laughs Software Development Process1) Order the T-shirts for the Development team2) Announce availability3) Write the code4) Write the manual5) Hire a Product Manager6) Spec the software (writing the specs after the code helps to ensure that the

: #Laughs The newlyweds showed up at the hotel and asked for the honeymoon suite."Do you have reservations?" asked the desk clerk."Only one, " replied the groom, "she won't take it up the ass."

: #Laughs A husband and wife are in bed watching "Who Wants to be a Millionaire". The husband asks for sex. The wife says, "No." > Her husband asks, "Is that your final answer?" > She responds, "Yes." He says, "Then, I'd like to cal

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