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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs Casey married a rich widow, but they didn't get along.

Posted in: #Laughs

FunnyJohny

: #Laughs Bill and Bob met at the club for their weekly golf game.And for the third week in a row, it was raining too hard to play.Bill: Well, Bob, what do you want to do now?Bob: Darts?Bill: Nah.Bob: Shoot some pool?Bill: Nah.Bob: Cards?Bill: Nah.

Posted in: #Laughs

FunnyJohny

: #Laughs |A reporter outside of a courtroom asked a defendant clad only in a barrel: "Oh, I see your attorney lost the case!" The defendant answered, "No, we won."

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs A doctor, a nurse, and the top executive of an HMO have all died and are in line together at the Pearly Gates.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs |The schoolteacher was taking her first golfing lesson."Is the word spelt p-u-t or p-u-t-t?'' she asked the instructor."P-u-t-t is correct,'' he replied."Put means to place a thing where you want it.

Posted in: #Laughs

FunnyJohny

: #Laughs "That bastard husband of mine wanted me to sleep with the landlord because he lost the rent money playing poker," the housewife told a neighbor."You didn't do it, did you?""I have to admit I did -- though with certain misgivings, I might add.

Posted in: #Laughs

FunnyJohny

: #Laughs The Roadrunner was feeling very amorous one day, and since there were no other female roadrunners around, he decided to look around.He happened to spot a lovely dove.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs |At the time of writing, Microsoft's slogan for Windows 95 was "Where do you want to go today?" These are some alternative and probably more truthful ad slogans for use with Windows.1.

Posted in: #Laughs

FunnyJohny

: #Laughs Two friends in a Bar:JACK: Joe, at what moment does your wife shout loudest during sex?JOE: Er..., when I clean myself off with the curtains.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs Q: What is the difference between a blonde and a refrigerator?A: A refrigerator doesn't fart when you pull your meat out of it.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs One of Sigmund Freud's early patients rushed out into an Austrian afternoon on her way to meet her best friend at a coffee house.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs An efficiency expert concluded his lecture with a note of caution."You need to be careful about trying these techniques at home.""Why?" asked somebody from the audience."I watched my wife's routine at dinner for years," the expert explained.

Posted in: #Laughs

FunnyJohny

: #Laughs As soon as the dentist asked the patient to sit down, he pulled out his wallet.Seeing this the dentist said, "Please don't, you don't need to pay me now".The patient answered: "Pay you! I just want to count my money before I'm unconscious!"

Posted in: #Laughs

FunnyJohny

: #Laughs There were three guys stuck on an island.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs The primary color of your car is "Bond-Q."

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs Before a burglary trial, the judge explained to the defendant, "You can let me try your case, or you can choose to have a jury of your peers." The man thought for a moment.

Posted in: #Laughs

FunnyJohny

: #Laughs What do you get if you cross a snake with a hotdog? A fangfurther.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs How do rabbits get to work? By rabbit transit!

Posted in: #Laughs

FunnyJohny

: #Laughs What is six inches long, two inches wide, has a head on it, andwomen are crazy for it?Money!!!

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs A Greek and Italian were sitting down one day debating who had the superior culture.

Posted in: #Laughs

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