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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs What do witches use pencil sharpeners for? To keep their hats pointed.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs What is the difference between the government and the Mafia? One of them is organized.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs The European Commission have just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the EU rather than German,which was the other possibility.As part of the negotiations, Her Majesty's government conceded that English spellin

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs A man wakes up in a hospital bed after a terrible accident and cries - "DOC, DOC...I can't feel my legs, I can't feel my legs!!!"Well of course you can't silly!", replies the Doc..."I've cut off both of your arms."

Posted in: #Laughs

FunnyJohny

: #Laughs How Shit HappensIn the Beginning was The PlanAnd then came the AssumptionsAnd the Assumptions were without formAnd the Plan was completely without substanceAnd the darkness was upon the face of the WorkersAnd the Workers spoke amongst themselves,

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs Q: What do you get when you put an experimental monkey in a blender? A: Rhesus Pieces.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs In a very small alley two trucks driving in opposite directions meet. As the drivers are equally stubborn, neither of them wants to reverse. They angrily look one at the other. Finally, one of them picks up a newspaper and start

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs Shultz, a lawyer, bribed a man on the jury to hold out for a charge of manslaughter, as opposed to the charge of murder which was brought by the prosecution.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs Question: What do you call a gay man's scrotum?Answer: Mud flaps!

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs The Army Airborne major was used to harassment from AirForce fliers about crazy Army paratroopers jumping out of perfectly good aircraft.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs Perhaps you know why women over fifty don't have babies. They would put them down somewhere and forget where they left them.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs What do you get when you cross an Owl and a Rooster? A cock that stays up all night.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs There's this old priest who got sick of all the people in his parish who kept confessing to adultery.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs At a party, a conjurer was producing egg after egg from a little boy's ear.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs GENERAL 1.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs |A farmer and his pig were driving down the road when a cop pulled him over.The cop asked the farmer, "Didn't you know it is against the law to ride with a pig in the front of you truck?"The farmer replied, "No, I didn't knowed that."The cop ask t

Posted in: #Laughs

FunnyJohny

: #Laughs |A couple of young fellers were fishing at their special pond off the beaten track when out of the bush's jumped the Game Warden !!Immediately, one of the boys threw his rod down and started running through the woods, and hot on his heels came the

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs How do you make a rabbit fast? Don't feed it.

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FunnyJohny

: #Laughs Deep within a forest a little turtle began to climb a tree.After hours of effort he reached the top, jumped into the air waving his front legs and crashed to the ground.After recovering, he slowly climbed the tree again, jumped, and fell to the gr

Posted in: #Laughs

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